Being your true self, being your true nature, is different than experiencing it with thought. Realize that you are the mystery, and you can't really look at mystery because you are only capable of looking from the mystery. There is a very awake, alive and loving mystery, and that is what is seeing through your eyes at this moment. Encounter pure mystery, which is pure spirit, and wake up to what you are.
The smile of the contemplative in the presence of the Beloved is merely a physical expression of the total joy one perceives as one communes with God. St. Bernard used to say, "The joy of being in love is in the very loving." In other words, joy is not to be sought for itself, but is a by-product of love, and the smile is but the physical, exterior expression of the inner joy-love.