Crying was my most constant companion. One day, while walking on the beach, I saw the reflection of the sun on the water. Inexplicably, I felt a sense of a Presence larger than life itself after seeing a patch of light differently than ever before. The light image kept me alive ... I was suffused with love. I had sensations of warmth from the light coming into my body and entering each cell, having awareness of my whole body in a startling way. It felt comforting, life-changing and dramatic, yet peaceful. I was able to function again. My most important focus became to deepen my experience of being suffused by the light.
There is but one solitude, and that is great, and not easy to bear, and to almost everybody come hours when they would gladly exchange it for any sort of intercourse, however banal and cheap, for the semblance of some slight accord with the first comer ... But perhaps those are the very hours when solitude grows; for its growing is painful ... But that must not mislead you. The necessary thing is after all but this: solitude, great inner solitude. Going-into-oneself and for hours meeting no one -- this one must be able to attain. To be solitary, the way one was solitary as a child ... Think of the world you carry within you ... What goes on in your innermost being is worthy of your whole love ...