The experience of transcendence occurs within the nature of things -- our nature. A small mustard-seed grows into a tree big enough for birds to come and roost in its branches. To try to make it grow faster or slower would be absurd and counterproductive. It is the same when we experience the growth of Divine Love in our hearts as we let the husk of the ego drop away and like seed we die to self that we may fulfill the destiny that is our true meaning, that the potential of life within us may come to fruition.
The sublimation of the human will to the Greater Will is the prime challenge of the spiritual Journey. In fact, this transference of one's allegiance from self to Self, and to God, IS the essence of the spiritual Path. All other aspects of this Path -- all practices, all tests and trials, all teachings and disciplines, and all of the love and the adversity are a part of the great drama of the gradual fusing of the mortal, lesser self with that which is immortal and immutable. But in order to become one with God, the soul itself must first possess an identity, rounded out and matured as a worthy offering to give back to its Creator.